The Expectation of Misery

wednesdays with wayne Jun 14, 2017

Have you ever dreaded something because, well, you know it’s going to be horrible?  A lot of people dread going to the dentist.  Here in the U.S., most of us dread going to the Department of Motor Vehicles.  But why?  

You were trained to expect misery!

In this week’s Wednesdays With Wayne we’ll look at how that happens and how to stop it!

Pregnant women are never met with “oh how wonderful, you’re going to have an amazing experience.”  Nope.  What happens is that everyone comes out with their own story of what pregnancy and childbirth is like.  I know this is odd coming from a guy; it’s something I’ve noticed and it’s a great example of what we do to spread the misery when we really don’t have to!

 

We play “Can You Top This” with our horror stories.  

“Oh, you were at the DMV for two hours?  I was there for three… four… five… two...

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The MYTH of Balance

wednesdays with wayne Jun 07, 2017

Over the past month, the topic of Work/Life Balance has come up so many times, I took it as a sign that you would want to take a closer look at that in your Wednesdays With Wayne this week!

Quick, if you’re only getting this by my Facebook page, then please click that link above and get it in your email.  And if you’re only getting this in email, then heck, connect with me on my Facebook page!

Here’s the question: is there really such a thing as balance? We look for work/life balance, but there’s no really balance, is there? In fact, it never feels like quite enough.  There’s always more to do at work. There is always something missing at home.   And free time?? Really?

So the whole concept of work/life as being some form of balance is really a total myth! What we have is life!

What We Have Is LIFE!

How we fill the time we have each day is totally up to us. Really. How we fill that time we have each day really is totally up to each...

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Short Attention Span and No Sex???

wednesdays with wayne May 31, 2017

Have you ever felt… done… just, done?  There’s no more to give and you might even be too worn out to receive.  You’re tired all the time and you’ve got a low–level of irritability brewing so you feel like you could snap at the people you work with and/or the ones you care about.  You feel stressed and you gravitate toward the “wrong” foods – you don’t need sugar, carbs, alcohol, or more coffee (no, really you don’t need them), yet you find yourself seeking them.  Even sex seems like it’s just too much trouble.  You wonder whether you’re depressed and to answer that question, you curl up in a ball on the couch or in bed (perhaps taking some chips, cookies, or ice cream with you) as you get numb with the TV.

Honestly, most of us have felt something like that at some point.

It’s called Burnout and it happens when you get sleep deprived and give until you don’t have...

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The Two Secrets To Becoming Even MORE Influential

wednesdays with wayne May 24, 2017

How do you get people to support your dreams and goals?

The answer is that you do it the same way that super leaders become SO influential!  In this week’s Wednesdays With Wayne, you learn two simple secrets to becoming more influential and enlisting support for your goals and dreams.

Organizations (including families) begin their failure path when the leader(s) lose track of their values and purpose.  Without those core foundational elements, how can you expect people to line up to follow and support you.

We need to know what you believe in.  That means, YOU need to know what you believe in.  It’s time to reflect inward for a moment (yes, again) and call out three to five core values that you hold dearly.  It really doesn’t matter what they are as long as they’re yours.  You could value love, church, health, excellence, learning, competition, or greed.  Think about it, come up with your own list and recognize that really,...

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Trust Me, I'll Catch You

wednesdays with wayne May 17, 2017

You know when you see someone struggling with something and you are just itching to help them, but you don’t dare because you don’t have that kind of relationship with them?

Sure, sometimes you extend a kind gesture for a stranger.  I’m thinking bigger.  What I’m talking about is your ability to really step in and guide someone, to change the trajectory of their lives, if even for a moment.

In working with clients across the country (and around the world) the thing that stands out is that they are in a business of helping others.  As individuals, you want to have a positive impact on the people we encounter.

And while you might want to be that proverbial boy scout who walks the little old lady across the street, she has to want to accept your help.

The question then, is this:
How do you get people to accept the help and care you offer? 

The answer – TRUST.

In order to be influential, you have to demonstrate that you are trustworthy...

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Iā€™ll Bet Youā€™re Gambling With What Matters Most

wednesdays with wayne May 10, 2017

Have you ever felt like you were doing something that wouldn’t really make a difference, like you were spinning your wheels just to get through the task?  Maybe you feel like that at work. Maybe it’s that committee you joined and realized is strangling you.  Maybe it’s your relationship.  You know that something is off, but hey, you just keep going.

In this week’s Wednesdays With Wayne, you’ll poke around at the concepts of Alignment and Congruence and even a phenomenon called “the gambler’s dilemma.”  

Let’s start right there!  The gambler’s dilemma happens when you’re playing a game; you’re invested.  You’ve begun betting, and you realize that your hand is okay, but it’s only just okay.  It’s not great.  You’re not sure that you’ll win, but you don’t want to lose.  The dilemma is this – you’ve invested so much already,...

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You "sell" what??

wednesdays with wayne May 03, 2017

My clients’ journeys are never straight forward.  Like so many of us, you think you want one thing and really need something you hadn’t even considered.  

The theme of the comments (and wonderful compliments) that have come my way centers on how authentically I’ve helped people to become.  And in today’s Wednesdays With Wayne, the question arises – how do you “sell” the outcome that you give to people?

“I’m more me!”

“I’m so much more free to be my authentic self!”

Most people believe that they’re already being themselves.  I mean, don’t you?  And yet, it’s not until we step into the challenges of discovery of our personal values and the courage to step up or step back, it’s not until you’re guided or shown how you can be different that you really let go of who you thought you were supposed to be.  It’s at that point, you are on the path to...

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How Do I Know?

wednesdays with wayne Apr 26, 2017

How Do I Know?

Depending on where you put the emphasis, that could be read as HOW do I know?
Or perhaps, How DO I Know?
Or maybe, How do I Know?
Or is it, How do I KNOW?

For the sake of this Wednesdays With Wayne, we’ll go with the latter:
How do I KNOW?

People ask me all the time, how do I KNOW if…
…if it’s right to hire, fire, invest, go forward with this project or that project or…?  The list goes on.  

Here’s the answer –

  1. Do some research – making as informed a decision as possible is important without delaying deciding because there will always be more information to be had.  Get some information.  Then…
  2. Trust your gut – your instincts are probably good.  And finally…
  3. Course correct as needed.

Honestly, you may never KNOW for certain if the choice you made is the right one.  You can only know the results.  When you connect the dots, you’re looking backward to see what...

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This guy just challenged me big time!

wednesdays with wayne Apr 19, 2017

When I travel, I like to meet with my clients before I begin training their teams.  It’s important that we’re on the same page, that I understand the needs of the business owner, and that they know my working style.

We had a great dinner together.  It was casual and we began to get to know each other on a deeper, more personal level.  Toward the end of dinner, I asked a question for which the answer is usually predictable.

In this Wednesdays With Wayne, I’m about to share with you the answer he gave that shook me up quite a bit.

Me (in a light, upbeat tone):  So, what are you hoping for or expecting from me? I thought he’d say, “Oh, just do what you think is best for us” or something like that.  I smiled as I awaited his answer.  

Him (smiling back):  Excellence.

I laughed and told him that of course he’d get that.  I always bring that and I expect it of myself.

And yet, that word… that single...

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How To Easily Clear Negative Thoughts In One Step!

wednesdays with wayne Apr 12, 2017

Arrrrggggghhhhh!!!  Those thoughts.  Even DynamicLeaders and High Performers have those thoughts that creep in.  They give you the “gift” of self-doubt.  They tell you to think again and they remind you that you’re not good enough.

In this week’s Wednesdays With Wayne, I call B.S. on that!  And you can too!

There’s a quick “pattern interrupt” you can use for yourself.

It’s fast and it works like MAGIC!  

Try this now and see how you feel –

Lean back, take a breath, look up, and say (or think really loudly) Reset – Reset!!!

Really, it’s three steps all wrapped into one action:  Lean back, take a breath (and blow it out) while saying “Reset!  Reset!”  If you wanted to, you could toss in “I’m A DynamicLeader®” after saying Reset.  It makes for a powerful statement.

Here’s the thing:  You’ve been looking downward at your...

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