Someone, right now, needs you to recognize them a little bit more. A family member, a coworker, the grocery bagger; that person is right in front of you.
Acknowledging a person who needs it is worth celebrating. Doing so shakes up your subconscious and puts you on alert for who else you could be acknowledging.
That becomes a wave of “good vibes” and can spread throughout your organization, your family, or beyond, into the community.
When I spoke in Oxford, UK, my focus was on getting to “I see you” before the perfunctory “hey, how are ya?”
The standard one-word answer to that question means you’re not really “fine.”
That’s why you’ve got to go with truly seeing the other person. See them. Acknowledge the human in front of you.
Try these on:
Every time I...
Before I jump into the topic for this week, I thought it’d be a good idea to put some history in front of you.
Most U.S. citizens don’t know this fun fact.
While “adopted” by the second continental congress in July, The Declaration of Independence wasn’t actually ratified until August 2nd, 1776.
And then…On September 9th, the Continental Congress voted to change from being the United Colonies to The United States. And since communication didn’t happen over the Internet, but rather by boat, it wasn’t until January 14th, 1784 (almost eight years after creating and signing the Declaration of Independence) that the United Colonies turned United States actually voted to become an independent Sovereign Nation.
That’s significant because we often seem to celebrate the wrong things on the wrong dates. There’s no blame here; I’m inviting you to tilt your head to one side and get...
Occasionally themes flow through my life and when I notice that they do, I need to call attention to them. On my podcast, One Sharp Sword – Cutting Through To What Matters Most, the past few interviews have offered me this point from different perspectives:
I Believe In ME.
Perhaps the most powerful belief you can have in any living human is the belief and faith that you put in yourself. Something got you to this point. You’re the oldest you’ve ever been which means that you’ve survived to NOW.
I Believe In My Ability To Figure This Out!
For any situation, will you give in? Or will you see it through. Now, I’m not opposed to a pivot if new information requires that. That’s different from giving up or giving in.
That also doesn’t mean that you can’t or shouldn’t ask for help.
You can and should. No one NO ONE is self-made. Anyone who is successful has support and personally,...
Stepping up, stepping in –
I haven’t been super consistent. But when I am, it’s amazing how much it fuels just repeatedly doing that thing I had let go. It almost becomes self-perpetuating.
The self-perpetuating piece is about momentum vs. inertia. That’s science. That’s psychology, too.
Momentum is easier to keep going if you don’t have to overcome inertia each time.
Bad at flossing your teeth? Put your floss right near your toothbrush so you pick it up first.
Bad at exercising? Put your exercise clothes on before you go to bed, you’ll have to take them off at some point and it’s a mental challenge to take them off to get into fresh clothes without at least moving a little.
The key here is that getting over small humps in the road can create the momentum needed to get other the next hump, and the next and the next. Once you’re on a path that productive, it actually feels worse to stop than it...
I have a fish tank that brings me peace. The sound of the fountain-like flow from the filter into the tank’s water creates an atmosphere that is tranquil. I barely hear it, but it’s there, in the background.
The fish find the current and the structures to swim through. There was a point when I’d open the lid and they’d come to the top and I’d pet them. Yep, I used to pet my fish. They seemed to appreciate it because, though I know they were waiting for food, they hung out at the top while I’d talk to them and give them attention.
Odd… them and me, I know.
Today’s blog isn’t about my quirks, though. It’s about the other quirks we have in common. I really don’t like having to clean the tank. It’s almost an hour out of my day. It requires me to get wet and yucky, and I could be doing other more productive things.
So, even though I have “Fish Tank” listed on my priority to do...
Think of your biggest aspiration, your biggest future goal or desire.
Mine is big, really big. Really, really big.
And sometimes, everyyyyy so often, I wonder whether I’ll get there. Will I ever get what I truly desire?
Doubt creeps in.
And guess what!
While we ALL have doubt from time to time, I don’t allow any of those thoughts to linger.
My really, really, really big goal will happen because in my mind, it already has. The journey is underway. And yes, obstacles pop up. Yes, it seems so big that I wonder if it’s really something I should pursue. And no, that thought doesn’t get to live with me.
As I write, those sentences about “wondering if” come up the way I’d describe something mundane to someone. That is, they’re distant from me. I don’t keep them around. They’re a menu item that I read and choose not to order.
The flip side of that is that the rest of the menu is...
You know that I’m cheering you on. We’re deep into this year and you’ve done so much already. Yes, yes, you still have a lot on your to-do list. You’re on a great trajectory with pretty darn good momentum.
Hiccups and setbacks are a part of the process.
And besides my cheering you on, there’s one voice you need to listen to with great attention – Yours. Your voice and the whispers of desire that tell you what you really want. Listen to that voice.
The voice of shame and doubt, that’s never your voice.
Think about it, when you hear phrases like “You can’t do that” or “you don’t deserve that, you haven’t earned it” or “who are you to think like that? you’re not good enough” – that voice is never yours. It’s one you integrated from a family member, teacher, clergy, or some other authority figure.
Your whispers and your desires, your...
Don’t let it show.
Cover it up.
Conceal anything that looks like a flaw.
In my first book, Choosing Your Power, I talked about how we humans are perfectly flawed. We are, in fact, already perfect. If there were an ideal of perfection and everyone looked like that, just think how boring the world would actually be!
The truth is, perfection is a verb.
Sure there’s a noun, the state of being perfect, and you get there by perfecting the thing that you’ve dared to bring out of you.
Perfection is a dynamic, iterative process.
Perfection, the art of perfecting something, is a dynamic (never static) process.
And it’s iterative. It doesn’t come out as one and done. You didn’t. Not when you learned to walk, ride a bicycle, talk, or read.
We love seeing the shiny and perfect.
And, I’m pretty sure if you think about it, you actually really like the dusty and...
“Shhhhh! Don’t say it out loud; you’ll jinx it.”
Have you ever heard that?
Have you ever said that?
I know, I used to be superstitious and felt like if I said a wish out loud or told anyone what I truly desired, that somehow it would be taken away from me. If I dared to tell someone my deepest wish, somehow, I’d be popping my own balloon.
But then I started studying.
And I started experimenting.
And I encouraged others. And they started experimenting.
It turns out that when you DARE TO DECLARE, you burst any feelings of jinxing something.
Here’s a solid truth for your consideration:
CLARITY gives you certainty.
And certainty builds confidence.
If you’re not confident, you’re giving energy to doubt.
Where do YOU choose to put your energy?
Where do you CHOOSE to put your energy?
You know that you get more of what you focus on,...
Last week I wrote about just because you said you wanted something at one point in your life doesn’t mean that you need to keep doing that thing or retain that thing. The world has changed. You have changed.
That said, you may have goals and dreams and big aspirations that haven’t changed. And you may have things that need to get done to reach those big goals and dreams.
You need to do them.
And you need to do other things too.
I’m there with you.
I find the other things that are important and keep me focused and feed my dopamine levels as I gamify how much I can get done.
Meanwhile, the things that are needle-movers for the goal sit.
And then comes the justifying and ration-of-lies-ing that we step into. The other stuff is SOOOO important.
What about the goals? Did they stop being important?
You didn’t change them up. You just found other things to do before moving towards...