You NEED to take this into the New Year.
Look back at the past year. It all went pretty quickly, didn’t it? Amazing! As you lean into the new year ahead, it’s important to recognize how much power you really have.
Any time we’re given a challenge that seems beyond our current capabilities, we shrink back a little and we take inventory. “Can I really do this? Am I good enough?”
We’re told to feel the fear and do it anyway. You can choose to feel the fear. It’s there for a reason. Once you realize you aren’t in any mortal danger, you can then choose to feel something else.
You Can Then CHOOSE To Feel Something Else
What could you feel?
Could you feel a trust in yourself so deeply that you know, no matter what, you can figure it out – whatever the new situation holds, do you have that trust in yourself? Do you hold that faith?
The opposite of fear isn’t courage,...
Your current circumstances are the result or the outcome of the actions you’ve taken to this point. That means, you have gained some experience along the way.
That experience has given you the expectations for your next outcome.
And that, my friends, is a horrible loop to get locked into.
I’m not saying ignore your experience. I am going to suggest that you create different imagery for your expectations.
What if you expected your life to be easy? What if the things you wanted, truly desired, came to you easily?
Did you “yeah, but” me there?
If that was your first response to that thought, you’re simply stuck.
You’re stuck in someone else’s old stories that working hard is the only way for things to pay off.
What if you truly LOVED everything about your life? I mean, you awaken and you love the bed you’re in. You love the smell of the air and the sounds around you. You...
Last week I suggested that you look at the things you value and uplevel the way you value yourself. If you didn’t get that out of last week’s Wednesday With Wayne, I’d invite you to go back to it with that sentence in mind.
One way of valuing yourself is to treat yourself as if you mattered.
YOU are the CEO of your own life. You might feel like you are at the mercy of someone else’s agenda. Ultimately, the schedule you set is your own. For every job I had that took me out the door before the sun came up, I had to acknowledge that I chose to do that. No one made me stay in that job. And then, I branched out on my own. And now, I smile at my boss every morning as I look in the mirror. We’ve got this. We’re here to serve greatly: me, myself, and I.
Think about being the CEO of your life – the Chief Executive Officer.
If you had an outside executive land in your life, what would be the first three changes that person would...
Oh, really. For meeeee? You shouldn’t have…
Ahhhh, December! A time to prove to ourselves and loved ones that we really do care.
What’s the cost? No, this isn’t a lecture on overspending. (You already have that playing in your own head. I don’t need to add fuel to that.) This is about value.
What we value changes over time. That’s a good thing. Think about what you used to hope the weekend would bring. That’s sure changed in the past decade or two, hasn’t it??
Also, the value of the things we buy – that changes depending on context.
The cost of a bottle of water at an outlet is less than a dollar per bottle.
The price of that same bottle of water at a concert or event is six dollars.
It’s the same bottle.
What about those changes? What would the value be if that same bottle were being sold in the middle of a desert? What’s the difference if the product...
The Quality of Your Life Can Be Assessed by the Quality of Your Questions
Are you curious during the day? What kinds of questions do you ask yourself and/or ask each other?
Let’s start with the questions that tear you down.
You wake up, you glance in the mirror on your way to the bathroom and you utter under your breath, “how did I gain more weight?”
You turn on the news and you murmur, “why are those people so stupid?”
Another news story, and you shrink back, “will that happen to me?”
The quality of the questions you ask determines the quality of your life. Your subconscious is ALWAYS listening. If your subconscious was another person who could ONLY speak the truth to you, what kinds of responses do you think your subconscious would give you to these questions:
They’re two different questions. Your subconscious will do the work...
It’s not selfish to want your light to shine.
It’s not “anti-community” to be the lighthouse bringing ships through the passage safely. You, living into your best self, bettering yourself every day, isn’t selfish. You become the model for others. And no, this isn’t about “you MUST better yourself” which would imply you’re not good enough. Oh, you’re MORE than good enough. This is about you knowing that there’s more for you to explore, enjoy, and contribute meaningfully to.
One of my VIP 1:1 Coaching Clients questioned what I meant when I said that I wake up wondering how I might serve greatly today. I do that every day. It’s my purpose and passion to provide a perspective that lifts others.
It’s funny – I mean, not really funny. It’s just that my client interpreted service as having to dote on others. It’s not that at all. What’s your gift? How can...
Think about what Ultimate Freedom is. I’ve asked this of so many people and all too often, the answer is stunned silence.
“Well, I guess not having to do anything I don’t want to.”
That’s such a negative-based, defensive response. And it provoked my curiosity:
If ultimate freedom is NOT doing something you don’t like, what is it you would WANT TO DO?
That’s one of the hardest questions to answer. Most people have a lot of rules pop up before they answer that question.
“I mean, I know what I’d want to do, but it’s not practical.”
“Oh, what I’d like to do, my (husband/wife/spouse/other) wouldn’t let me.”
“No, I’ve put off what I want to do for so long, I don’t even know what it is anymore.”
Please read that last line again and tell me if it resonates with you. (Reply to this post and let me know.) Surprisingly, A LOT of people have...
In reviewing some notes from a client, he asked, “When will it all ease up?”
I believe that this indicates that a growth spurt is immanent. When you wonder when – or if – it will all ease up, you’re either going to find a way to regress, to feel overwhelmed, and to do things that keep you in that state of fluster, or you grow.
“When will it all ease up?”
The truth is that it doesn’t ease up. You just get better at handling what comes your way.
Oh, and you also gain a little perspective and realize that YOU ARE THE ONE THAT PUT IT ALL THERE.
– The bills. You made choices that got you to the place of enjoying what you have. You just
deferred the payment for those choices.
– The business details. You made choices to hire or not hire, to expand...
Just in time for the holidays… Food for thought!
Have you ever considered what triggers you?
I don’t live my life offended. I’m pretty sure you don’t either, and yet, everrrryyyy soooo often, something sneaks in. Something happens that we find ourselves defending what we believe in.
We stop thinking about the other person having a right to their opinion without having to fix it.
Fighting happens when we believe that someone has broken integrity.
More specifically (and let this sink in) that we somehow let our own integrity get broken by someone else.
We openly root for our favorite politicians and sports teams. When we do so, we believe others should join us. Yet what really happens is that we have opened the door for others to share their opinions with us.
Someone promises you something and breaks that promise.
It happens over and over again. And yet, you want to believe that people are good. Well,...
Psychological Safety is such a big topic!
Stick with me here. It’s going to feel a little heavy in the middle. I promise you’ll have something positive to hang onto. In a short blog, I can’t go into ALL of the details I’d want. It’d become a full chapter or two. You’ll find something for you in a few places here. Read on!
The current workforce demands psychological safety as a foundational value. When I consult with organizations, the leadership is perplexed. “How are we supposed to offer something like that?”
And that’s actually a great question because psychological safety means so many different things; every one of us is going to have our own definition of what makes us feel “psychologically safe.”
Let’s flip this around for a moment:
What makes us feel unsafe?
There are two key things that create a sense of feeling unsafe psychologically:
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