Here’s something that could kill you – it’s known as the phenomenon of putting your attention on something so that it increases the likelihood of colliding with that thing.
This week’s Wednesdays With Wayne focuses on Target Fixation (see what I did there?).
The phenomenon is so powerful that professional riders and racecar drivers are taught to focus on the road ahead and to keep their eyes and attention off of the wall or the tail light ahead. Have you ever found yourself drifting to the line when you’re driving while thinking, “stay off the line?” You’ve been affected by Target Fixation.
We are driven toward that which we dwell upon.
Then if that’s the case, extrapolate. Look at your life – what you focus on comes about. Why are there so many mean people in the world? Because you’re focusing on mean. Look at the posts on line that you’ve “liked” and notice what you...
All too often you set off down a path of getting it done… getting it all done… and yet you somehow feel thwarted. You’re thrown off, stopped by your own doing.
“I can’t submit this, it’s not ready.”
It looks like procrastination. It feels like a burden. And the process of letting out something that is incomplete makes you feel so horribly vulnerable.
Welcome to this week’s Wednesdays With Wayne!
The truth is, the not-doing actually brings more unfavorable judgment than producing something that’s not “perfect.”
I’m a five-time author with several #1 Best Selling books. And you know what, I want to go back and fix pieces of each book. The voice in my head echoes: “I could have done better. That work could have been better.” And, yes, I probably could have. And yet, when people write to me to tell me how my words have helped them, I once again become the believer in the...
Photo copyright Shannon Pernell. All rights reserved.
My friend and his wife that I quoted a few blogs back are smart people. And I LOVE how smart people put what they know into action. Sometimes you get stuck thinking about a situation or a person in a certain way. Maybe you can’t see a solution or maybe you’re feeling judged, or even judgmental.
Here’s this week’s Wednesdays With Wayne where you’re reminded about good ol’ Mental Floss! Yep. Sometimes the “stuck-ness” continues because you aren’t seeking a new perspective.
Mental floss is about clearing out what’s happening between your ears. Let go of old thinking and search for new possibilities. It doesn’t mean that you need to excuse the “bad” behavior of another person. It might mean that you capture a new perspective.
For example, some people are content to create chaos in other people’s lives. That’s...
I just had lunch with one of the smartest, most accomplished, self-aware men I’ve ever met. He was born into a life of luxury that was turned upside down in his early teens when his country became war-torn as a political hotbed. He literally went from having anything he could dream of to having nowhere to sleep.
As he grew to the wise man he is today, he engaged in quite a lot of study. Beyond studying politics and the health sciences, he studied personal development. He studied himself and his own reactions to the troubles around him.
We connected because we have our philosophies in common. Over lunch we discussed how circumstances are 100% up to the individual to choose to respond to. We talked about response vs. reaction.
And as we talked about my new project that stems from my #1 International Best-Selling Book, Dynamic Transitions (yes, I’m proud) we talked about why people feel so unfulfilled.
My quirky clients inspire me.
I've recently met with a couple who each had their own challenges. Hey, they’re human and really, we all have our personal stuff.
This week’s Wednesdays With Wayne takes you on a journey of looking inward to bring your Best Self out.
Andrew and Sally struggled to be better leaders for their organization. As partners, they also were challenged to be better for each other. Their lessons were separate, but so relevant for each of us!
Sally is such a giving person that, ironically, she struggled to demonstrate empathy. In fact, it was because of her efforts to engage in a human connection that by offering assistance and suggesting different fixes for problems, she ended up taking away the opportunity for the other person to actually grow. To really demonstrate presence, it's important to acknowledge the other person's condition and when you step in as a leader, it's important to leave room for the other person to...
There’s a concept I was just introduced to that actually could fall under the heading of business and leadership development.
It’s odd, and, I think it’s worth giving some thought-space to.
Yep, today's Wednesdays with Wayne focuses on a concept I recently heard in a lecture, that of transformational, hopeful, love.
Here are some quick questions:
Do we get so wrapped up in the competition of being better than that we forget what we're here to do?
Truly, isn’t the best thing we can offer someone else the opportunity to believe in themselves or in the work that they do?
Isn't it our job as leaders to make that something that we all focus on? When we give someone the opportunity to believe in a brighter future because we paint that future, doesn't that...
The engines whined as they revved up. We began to race down the runway readying for takeoff when everything, and I mean everything, came to an abrupt halt.
The engines were brought down and the brakes were applied forcefully.
I slid forward in my seat, held in place by my seatbelt.
Overhead, bags slid in their bins.
And in the galley just in front of us, a cacophonous clatter caught the attention of all.
What happened? Was it a near miss with another craft? Did the first officer miss something? Will we be circling around to try again?
We slowly made our way down the runway. Questions brewed. Are we going? Or… WHERE are we going? The captain finally announced that we were on our way back to the gate. That a circuit had blown in one of the engines, or maybe it was just that the indicator light came on. And, “it’s probably nothing, but maintenance wants to check it out so we’re heading back to the gate.”
Do Good Stuff!
My dad’s legacy is a statement he makes as a salutation sign-off at the end of a conversation. In The Significance Factor, I devoted a chapter to Do Good Stuff. It’s a reminder for each of us to make a difference, to give back, and to keep investing in education both for yourself, as well as for others.
My journey is shaped by my father who modeled the way for so many of us. I learned the value of giving back and being of service. He’s a bit of a “driver” type personality, so when he has an opinion about something or the way something should be done, he’ll let you know.
It was hard to grow up with; his opinion seemed to be THE opinion. I think I came to the place of everyone needs to have their own voice because of how I was raised. And now, as an adult, I’m figuring that out. Yes, I’m still figuring that out. The good news is that with social media, it’s clear that I’m not...
As I write this, I’m sitting on an airplane that is getting its second coating of de-icing. I joked that de icing is de best part.
Why joke? I mean, I’m now two-and-a-half hours delayed. Two and a half hours!!!
I could be angry.
I could be worried.
Instead, I changed perspective to know that I’m in the best hands possible and that the best decisions – safety-based decisions – are being made for me. So here I sit, with my computer in my lap, tackling one more thing on my list.
I was looking for inspiration. Who knew it would come in the form of a snowstorm that has caused massive flight delays!
I’m peaceful. I’m happy. I’m content. (I’m also not jammed into a middle seat, so that helps, but still…).
Here’s what’s cool for me as an observer of people: No one on this plane is pissed. No one is demanding that we get going....
How often has someone near you done something or suggest you do something together to which you responded (either with that voice in your head or out loud), “Oh, yeah, but that’s just not me.”
That’s fine for someone else, but that’s just not me.
Welcome to Wednesdays With Wayne where this week I’m asking you the question – How Do You Know???
Dancing is fine for other people, but that’s just not me.
Singing karaoke is okay for those people, I mean look, they’ve been drinking, but that’s just not me.
Dying your hair purple is okay, I guess. But wow, that’s just not me.
How do you know?
That purple hair thing… I dared to try it about six years ago.
It’s hair. I knew it’d grow out if I hated it. It’s like trying on a sweater or some other jewelry. It turned out that dying my hair purple made the darker areas darker and the slightly silver areas tinge with...