The Illusion of Control
As I write this, I’m sitting on an airplane that is getting its second coating of de-icing. I joked that de icing is de best part.
Why joke? I mean, I’m now two-and-a-half hours delayed. Two and a half hours!!!
I could be angry.
I could be worried.
Instead, I changed perspective to know that I’m in the best hands possible and that the best decisions – safety-based decisions – are being made for me. So here I sit, with my computer in my lap, tackling one more thing on my list.
Welcome To Wednesdays With Wayne
I was looking for inspiration. Who knew it would come in the form of a snowstorm that has caused massive flight delays!
I’m peaceful. I’m happy. I’m content. (I’m also not jammed into a middle seat, so that helps, but still…).
Here’s what’s cool for me as an observer of people: No one on this plane is pissed. No one is demanding that we get going....
Oh, I could never...
How often has someone near you done something or suggest you do something together to which you responded (either with that voice in your head or out loud), “Oh, yeah, but that’s just not me.”
That’s fine for someone else, but that’s just not me.
Welcome to Wednesdays With Wayne where this week I’m asking you the question – How Do You Know???
Dancing is fine for other people, but that’s just not me.
Singing karaoke is okay for those people, I mean look, they’ve been drinking, but that’s just not me.
Dying your hair purple is okay, I guess. But wow, that’s just not me.
How do you know?
That purple hair thing… I dared to try it about six years ago.
It’s hair. I knew it’d grow out if I hated it. It’s like trying on a sweater or some other jewelry. It turned out that dying my hair purple made the darker areas darker and the slightly silver areas tinge with...
Have YOU Created A Monster?
My wife turned to me and said, “I respectfully disagree.” We were discussing self-esteem. It turned out that we both actually DID agree with each other. We just had a different approach to the topic. No one gets a prize for just showing up. Showing up is your job.
And, sometimes we need a cheerleader in our corner, someone to remind us that we can do it. That’s different than being given a prize for just trying. If you get in the game, I’ll cheer you on. If you win, I’ll celebrate that win. If you don’t win, I’ll remind you that you’re capable of figuring it out and help you strategize for how to do better.
That’s different than telling you that you’re wonderful just for even having the dream of maybe wanting to try to put your toe in the water sometime soon maybe kind of.
Welcome to this week’s Wednesdays With Wayne!
No, I’m not a big fan of entitlement....
The Inner-Outer Connection
In a recent conversation with a client, we spoke about how to connect the outer world with the inner world and vice versa. Our conversation turned to how simplification and decluttering actually makes room for new possibilities to enter your world. Sometimes simply having space creates the new opportunities.
In terms of productivity, the more that you can clear your workspace and the more that you can simplify, the more productive you actually become. For those people who have incredibly complex lives and crowded calendars, simplification and decluttering becomes all the more important.
Here's something to practice: Look around. What one thing in your workspace or wherever it is you are seeing this or reading this, what one thing in that space can you get rid of, just one, right now? Maybe it's a pen that no longer works. Maybe it's that piece of mail (or stack of mail?) that you've been meaning to get to. Go through it; get rid of it. When...
A Light In The Darkness
Carrying a candle into the darkness does not change the flame. Darkness is not the presence of dark, but the absence of light. This week’s Wednesdays With Wayne post is about what I call The Torch of Clarity.
When you become super clear about your values and the role(s) you play in the world, doubt abates. When you become even more clear about your direction and your true sense of purpose, there’s no stopping you.
In fact, energy returns in a way that not only propels you into the future, but also draws people to you. You have greater levels of influence when you are clearer about what you stand for.
That’s magical, isn’t it?
Oh, hey, it’s valentine’s day – it’s a lovely time to remind you about relationships and I have a free gift for you – Relationship Recharge: 7 Tips to a More Vibrant, Dynamic, and Passionate Relationship!
Seriously, it’s free and it’ll help you in your...
Waiting for Sunrise
Is it a sleepless night? Or are you up early on purpose? It’s still dark out and you find yourself wondering about and perhaps worrying about all of the things you’ve got going on. The conversations you need to have, the conversations you hope you don’t have to have, and the conversations that you get to have all seem to blend in the twilight hours.
Now what? You’re up. You’ve begun to dabble at work. Perhaps you convince yourself that it’s time to get to your morning exercise routine or preparing for your first cup of coffee (I know that could be the same thing, just lifting a cup is your morning exercise).
For a number of us, we’re up and on it early.
We aren’t greeted by the sunrise. We’re already up, waiting to greet it! And sometimes we forget that greeting. And that’s what today’s Wednesdays With Wayne is all about.
As I write this,...
You Said YES!
That’s how you got to where you are – you said yes in a strange, circuitous, series. Looking out over the bluffs at Cabo San Lucas, I got into a discussion with a gentleman who had flown in from Australia. Kirby pointed out that in order for a gathering of so many great minds at a location like this, you had to have said YES in multiple different scenarios.
It’s a courageous word, YES.
There’s a lot of work that has gone into the “It’s time to say NO to more stuff” movement. And, to a degree, it’s true. We clutter our schedules with things that ultimately don’t really matter. And we need to say “No” more often.
I think we need to say YES more deliberately, too.
And you’re here because you’ve got a mission. Somewhere deep down, your work will change the lives of other people. In this Wednesdays With Wayne, you get to explore how to amplify that. You...
From Whining To Winning
You’re still in the first month of the year.
So how did everything you’re working on get so harrrrrrdddddd???
There really is so much to do that trying to do it all is overwhelming. It’s so hard that it makes you feel like you want to pack it all in, shut it all down, go back to bed, and hide under the covers.
How effective do you feel hiding out?
Yes, rest is an important part of refueling. That’s different than full-on retreat because you’re experiencing overwhelm. You’re in the whining/hide-from-the-world place because you’re chasing too many projects all at once and… you don’t feel effective anymore.
It… got… too… harrrrrrrddddddd…. (insert your own whining tone here)
Welcome To Your Wednesdays With Wayne
Perspective shift and tactical moves are needed here! To move from whining to winning, you need to do a few things:
- Look at your projects
- Track the tasks...
Feeling Behind?
Just try to paint the Golden Gate Bridge!
It’s only a couple of weeks into January! How can I feel so far behind already? I’ve heard this from clients and people close to me. It’s easy to understand how you might be feeling that way.
You’re a high performing DynamicLeader®. That means, you’re on the go and your to-do list is miles longer than anyone else’s. The problem is, that to-do list might have once been a badge of honor. It’s now a burden.
So… what to do….? What to do…?
Dump everything onto your to-do list. Not OFF of it, onto it. Seriously, spend about 10 minutes and think of every little detail you need to do in the next week or month or quarter. For example, not only did I have a stack of things I needed to scan and get out today, I also have travel arrangements I need to make for next...
Why you haven't started is BS!
We’re in the second week of the New Year and you’re struggling with those goals. The story you tell yourself is that you missed the starting gun so you shouldn’t run the race. The story you tell yourself is that if you can’t do it perfectly, you shouldn’t do it. The story you tell yourself is . . . what exactly?
It’s Blunt Reality Time here at this week’s Wednesdays With Wayne.
You don't have perfectionism. You have a fear of being a failure and being judged for it. You have a fear that being judged means you won’t be accepted. Ostracism – being separated from the pack – is such a powerful social/survival force, that we humans will do almost anything to avoid it. You call it perfectionism. So, you CHOOSE not to start. That way, the failure that you're experiencing is an outside force on you and not something that you're responsible for.
THAT is faulty thinking.
Perfectionism is putting...