That’s Not Fair!

wednesdays with wayne Jan 25, 2023

I was speaking with a Buddhist academic recently who was interested in the Culture of Caring™ program that I’m creating for organizations and leaders.  One of the key concepts that came up focused on the notion that we humans have a sense of fairness. 

 

For the most part, we see things as just, or balanced in some way. When we negotiate with someone, there’s still a sense of fairness. That is, we get a “deal” and they get what they bargained for or settled for. They chose.

 

The thing is, sometimes life doesn’t seem fair. And it isn’t. And it is. 

Something bad happens to you or someone you love…

Someone else gets the contract or promotion…

You get rejected from person after person, job after job, etc.

 

It’s not about fairness. 

Life is about the meaning we give to it. That’s not fair means that you’re feeling out of control by someone or something (a deity?) who is punishing you for something? What you’re interpreting as punishment is your way of finding a “fairness” scale. How can this thing happen to someone who is on Santa’s “good” list? 

 

Do you search for all of the things you might have done wrong in the hopes for atonement?

OR

Do you choose to interpret the events as a push for you to get more resolute about your beliefs in yourself and step into courage, choosing a different path for yourself? 

 

🡪 If THIS isn’t working, what will? The solution must be right there.

 

You may also recognize that there is a rhythm to life, and you are a part of a greater flow. It’s not about you as an individual. This is particularly evident when you begin to complain about all of the traffic. YOU are a part of that traffic and you’re making it harder for someone else, too. An hour earlier or an hour later and the flow on the road will be different.

 

So recognize that if you’re feeling stuck or shut out, if you’re at that point where That’s Not Fair comes bubbling out of you, it’s a matter of shifting perspective, taking a breath, and moving forward – just one more step and maybe in an oh-so-slightly different direction. 

 

Your numbers dropped in your business? That may or may not be personal. If you throw a “fairness” tantrum about it, no one will want to work with you, not even your team members. If you gain a new perspective and lead a new direction, stepping boldly into this new moment, you’ll have new followers and a new edge. Someone else will then be squeaking about how that’s not fair.

 

It's your turn. It’s your time. It’s not about fairness, it’s about courage.

 

Keep making your magic.

 

= Wayne =

See you here next week and if you’re interested in my Exponential Success Summit coming up April 28 and 29 in Hollywood, CA, reach out. It’s by application only. I’ve changed the format and I’m limiting the invitations. IF – get clear about this – IF you are serious about making some massive growth for yourself and your business in your life in 2023 and you would like to be considered as one of the few at the table, please message me privately. This isn’t for everyone. But if it’s for you, reach out.

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