Grasping Water: Lessons in Leadership and Relationships

wednesdays with wayne Oct 21, 2020

Just hold on loosely

But don’t let go

If you cling too tightly

You’re gonna lose control

- 38 Special 



That’s it, really. If you’ve ever tried to manage something and felt like you were losing control, it’s likely that you were holding on too tightly. That you were trying to manage every little thing. And that’s the most wonderful balancing act you’ll ever do with your business or with those you care about.


You have to hold on, it’s your business or family or friendship. And if you feel like you’re being pushed back on or worse, ghosted or ignored, it’s probably a sign that you need to lighten up.


So how do you keep track of the things you think you need to track?

You ask what is needed to get to the outcome.

  • “We’re headed toward our deadline. What can I help with?”
  • “We’re coming up on a weekend, I’d like to see xyz for myself/us. What needs to happen for that outcome to happen?
    • Note that this is a good way for you to state what you’d like without demanding it. It also implies you’re able to help with other things to get the outcome you’re after. 


Yes, sometimes there are details that no one else can or should manage.

And, most times there are things that other people are doing just fine with and what they need is your support and encouragement, and not your guidance or intrusion.


And that’s why you ask.

Not, “can I help?”

Not, “do you need help with anything?”

Both of those are closed-ended questions that would end up with a “no” response.


Ask more open-ended questions like, “What are you working on that I can help with?” or “What needs to happen to get ____ result?”


Whether for your business or your relationships (partner, kids, friends, etc.), you’ll get further by being present without being overbearing.


Now, the shut-down and shut-in thing has a lot of at-home relationships going badly. If you’d like seven quick tips for putting the life back in your relationships, check out this free download! Yep, relationship recharge. Take some of the ideas from it and adapt them for work. Note I said SOME of the ideas… Some others you’ll need to keep to yourself. Oh, and if you’re single, this would be something to do for yourself. Just focus the tips on how to treat yourself differently.


Let me know what you think. 

And now you have something to be humming to yourself all day… just hold on loosely…


You could use this about now… 

7 Tips to a more Vibrant, Dynamic, and Passionate Relationship 


See you here next week!


~ Dr P ~


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