How I Began Choosing My Power (and how to choose yours)

wednesdays with wayne Apr 21, 2021

The idea that life is a Worthy Struggle became the foundation for my first book. I thought about how important it was that we each engage in our passionate purpose, each day, every day, in whatever way we could. 


In committing to doing so, we will enjoy victories. Yet with victory there’s a price. The price of practice, of defeat, of perching on the precipice of something big while knowing it could evaporate at any moment. Facing daily challenges is a worthy struggle.


And I set out to write that book. 

As I wrote, I found myself being dragged down. I had to define and describe the struggle before noting how worthy it was. Everyone has a different sense of strife. And what was really hard yesterday isn’t so difficult today. 


I changed the writing. I focused on the message. I didn’t want to celebrate the struggle and the focal point was leading there. So, I changed the core message to how to become better every day. I wrote and wrote.


You can find small things, really tiny things that push you out of who you were yesterday and that growth keeps you on the path to becoming better every day.


I thought I was onto something. And, apparently an acne medicine company did too. Before I had the chance to circle back to purchase the url for the website, it had been swooped up. And, back I went to writing. My message of getting better was good. And, I had to do some edits. The core message shifted once more.


The focus was no longer on the struggle.

The focus was no longer on getting better.

The focus became clearly about how to own your space and step into who you deserve to be in the world, unapologetically. This process was all about Choosing Your Power.  


I had gone through a period of time where I recognized that I was going along to get along. I had been giving away small choices in my life and in recognizing that, came face to face with the realization that I didn’t have control over the big choices in my life. If I was going along to get along with the small stuff, what did that mean for the big stuff??


And then I found I wasn’t alone. I was doing some group programs and some speaking. I found myself helping people (mostly women) step into their power and claim their voice. I wasn’t alone in having this “go along to get along” issue. 


As I listened to them, certain themes emerged. I collated stories, questions, struggles, and triumphs from about 300 women. And I created an avatar – the amalgamation of all 300 voices. “How do I help them?” I’d ask the empty chair next to me. What do they need to hear?

And eleven chapters rolled out of me. Everything from Stop Thinking to reminders that You Are Enough. Chapters emerged about how to stop apologizing with reminders about giving yourself permission. Everything from communication to relationships, to empowering exercises showed up in my first book. 


It resonated with women and, to my surprise, it found its way into the hands of men who needed the same reminders. Choosing Your Power really IS about choice. It really IS about stepping into who you deserve to become at home and in the world.


Simply start there: Give yourself permission to take a bold step today. Just one.

And then another.


Recognize that as you seek choices, you gain greater awareness about choices available to you. That’s a very freeing upward spiral.


And so it goes.

Take a step, seek choice.

You’re on your way to Choosing Your Power


~ Dr P ~


If you’d like to explore this concept further, it's available for you at


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